Listening to your song
I drift into my dream
Being held by your arms
Being wooed by your charms
And hearing you whisper
Once again
If only I could walk those 56 miles
To feel your presence
And absorb your warmth
Leave the memories of our past
Only to create a present
Together
With you
Why was it that
Time was measured by a sporadic clock of
Long and short tics?
Only to create a ending of sudden stops
Was it only yesterday?
you kissed my lips
And my world melted
Was it only yesterday?
We joked of stupid sayings
And laughed till it hurt to smile
When the end came so abruptly
All I could say was goodbye
When secretly I wanted to linger
One last time
In your arms
In your breath
In your heart
Monday, July 25, 2005
Lingering
Tuesday, July 05, 2005
Not just some lame jesus camp
As I stare at my green Creation band that lies on my desk I wonder “can I ever get it back?” Its been a full 4 days since I’ve left Creation and I just took off the band which let me enter such an amazing place. Everything about it was so glorious. Somewhere between the lights, the music, the jokes, the heat, the smoothies and the spigot you realize that this is more than just some lame Jesus camp.
I try to explain to others the magnitude of such an experience. I try to give a taste of the music, share some of the jokes, and breakdown each and every amazing moment I had at Creation but it never works out. It’s as if I was standing at the edge of an infinite abyss and trying to give an estimate on how deep it was. You just can’t.
At first I thought that it was gonna be weird and I’m not gonna lie, first band, I thought “what have I gotten myself into?” but then Relient K and Switchfoot came and the lookof amazement struck my face. “I could do anything now” I thought for the high of Christian Rock pulsated through my veins. Soon the concert ended and the magic trickled away. “NO” I thought, “I want more.” Little did I know that Ellie, the bringer of all things good, had other plans in store.
Ellie opened me like a kid opening a present on Christmas day. Not only did she take me to Creation in the first place but she took me to Starfield. And it was here where I opened myself completely. In this yellow tent of worshipers I found myself, once again, worrying what people were gonna think about me if I raised my hands or sang along to songs I’d never heard. But I took a breath and looked around and there was Ellie smiling that gosh darn giddy smile of hers and I realized that Creation wasn’t about what others thought. It was about something totally bigger than you, something that though you’ve never seen it or touched it, you pay tribute to it and somehow out of all the craziness in the world: the love, the war, the wack-os and the dulls; you find yourself at Creation in a happy medium where everything makes total sense. And it clicked when I went to Starfield, it clicked when I sang “revolution“ and “all for you.” Yea, I was singing to god and that’s something that I don’t really do a lot. But it was ok because I was comfortable in this yellow tent because I felt bonded and united with everyone. I wasn’t one lonely person trudging through life, I was a part of a group and we had presence and love and that’s something that society can‘t destroy.
The next 3 days were spent in an amazing oasis of inside jokes, moments, praying, singing, dancing, and being free. Not one part of me was tied back by homework or college or boys; I was completely free. I was bounding around Mt. Union with 3 amazing people; one of them I knew quite well and the other two were complete strangers. I found myself happier than ever with these strangers and I treasured every moment with them. Why else would I write all our inside jokes down and post them on my Xanga.
But eventually the 4 days of concerts ended. And the jokes and the laughing and the singing had to stop. I will never forget what happened there whether it’s a joke or a revelation. Creation changed me and I’m not gonna lie, I’m proud of it. I know that people expected me to come back changed into some kind of Jesus freak. And yes I am a bit more religious now, but there is no doubt in my mind that more than just my beliefs changed at Creation. And for that I am eternally grateful to Ellie, to M.J., to Jeff, to Caitlin, to Chris, to Matt, to the bands, to the speakers, to Creation, and to God.
Thank you.
>>>Creation '05
I try to explain to others the magnitude of such an experience. I try to give a taste of the music, share some of the jokes, and breakdown each and every amazing moment I had at Creation but it never works out. It’s as if I was standing at the edge of an infinite abyss and trying to give an estimate on how deep it was. You just can’t.
At first I thought that it was gonna be weird and I’m not gonna lie, first band, I thought “what have I gotten myself into?” but then Relient K and Switchfoot came and the lookof amazement struck my face. “I could do anything now” I thought for the high of Christian Rock pulsated through my veins. Soon the concert ended and the magic trickled away. “NO” I thought, “I want more.” Little did I know that Ellie, the bringer of all things good, had other plans in store.
Ellie opened me like a kid opening a present on Christmas day. Not only did she take me to Creation in the first place but she took me to Starfield. And it was here where I opened myself completely. In this yellow tent of worshipers I found myself, once again, worrying what people were gonna think about me if I raised my hands or sang along to songs I’d never heard. But I took a breath and looked around and there was Ellie smiling that gosh darn giddy smile of hers and I realized that Creation wasn’t about what others thought. It was about something totally bigger than you, something that though you’ve never seen it or touched it, you pay tribute to it and somehow out of all the craziness in the world: the love, the war, the wack-os and the dulls; you find yourself at Creation in a happy medium where everything makes total sense. And it clicked when I went to Starfield, it clicked when I sang “revolution“ and “all for you.” Yea, I was singing to god and that’s something that I don’t really do a lot. But it was ok because I was comfortable in this yellow tent because I felt bonded and united with everyone. I wasn’t one lonely person trudging through life, I was a part of a group and we had presence and love and that’s something that society can‘t destroy.
The next 3 days were spent in an amazing oasis of inside jokes, moments, praying, singing, dancing, and being free. Not one part of me was tied back by homework or college or boys; I was completely free. I was bounding around Mt. Union with 3 amazing people; one of them I knew quite well and the other two were complete strangers. I found myself happier than ever with these strangers and I treasured every moment with them. Why else would I write all our inside jokes down and post them on my Xanga.
But eventually the 4 days of concerts ended. And the jokes and the laughing and the singing had to stop. I will never forget what happened there whether it’s a joke or a revelation. Creation changed me and I’m not gonna lie, I’m proud of it. I know that people expected me to come back changed into some kind of Jesus freak. And yes I am a bit more religious now, but there is no doubt in my mind that more than just my beliefs changed at Creation. And for that I am eternally grateful to Ellie, to M.J., to Jeff, to Caitlin, to Chris, to Matt, to the bands, to the speakers, to Creation, and to God.
Thank you.
>>>Creation '05
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